Thursday, January 28, 2010

Picking up the pieces

Ultimately there is no situation in life that can defeat us because of who God is in us. He is greater than what assails us.
He is more powerful than those who wound us.
His plans and purposes for our life cannot be thwarted by anyone or anything,
no matter how black things may seem.*
by Dr. Steve Stephens and Pam Vredevelt

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

All who wander are not lost

The sun is out and shining bright today.

It may only be 16 degrees outside, but hey...the sun is shining!

Between job hunting (sadly, nothing so far), sorting through more boxes from the move, helping Todd with dinners for he and his boys, well...I've been a busy little bee.

So today I am taking a break from the job search and heading outside in the sun to do some wandering in my new town.

And some pondering, for this heart of mine has much to ponder. Sometimes too much and in the wee hours of the morning, I lie awake with all my cares and concerns, their weight threatening to crush the life out of me. Only when I sense the sweet embrace of my Savior as He gently reminds me that He is near, that I am His and that He will carry the burden...only I find peaceful sleep.

Blessings to you all on this lovely (but very cold!) Tuesday! Hugs!!

Monday, January 18, 2010

From yesterday's sermon notes

Omaha winter

Fear of the unknown

is conquered by

Faith in the unseen.

Photo credit:
ADAM STREUR Gallup AV Productions
1001 Gallup DriveOmaha, NE 68102

Friday, January 15, 2010

Let's try this again

So...I moved to Omaha in November and two weeks later I left for Alabama because my mom broke her hip.

I came back to Omaha for two weeks and prepared for Zach to come...then we left again for Alabama to care for my mom.

Now I am back in Omaha. Driving across Missouri I couldn't help but remember all the times I had wished to visit the Midwest and now I was actually driving through it.

Beautiful. How I wished I had a real camera. I sold my Nikon to help pay for Zach's school tuition. I am actually okay with it. I had loved taking pictures, but my camera was a gift and it made for a conundrum: I loved to take pictures, but the camera was painful reminder of the giver. So I sold it.

As I drove into Omaha Monday night, I realized how truly happy I was to be 'home'. I don't miss the desert. I miss the people, to be sure. But the rest? Not at all. It was so hard to live there after Zach left for Ironwood. Miserable actually. So many memories that I was faced with every day. I am, in Omaha, still unpacking and trying to move forward. I applied for six jobs this week. Praying I get something soon. I truly am resting the in Lord for the perfect job. : )

I will post some pics of my little apartment this next week (I will borrow Todd's camera). It's cozy and comfortable. It's home and I love it. : )

Blessings and love to you all!

** Photo taken by:
ADAM STREUR Gallup AV Productions
1001 Gallup DriveOmaha, NE 68102USA

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

I know I'm a little late...

But Happy New Year! : )

And can I just say I am more than happy to see 2009 go by the wayside?

Good riddance, 2009! You have been the hardest year of my life and I won't be missing you. Not one iota!

So now we are five days into 2010. (Do you say two-thousand-ten or twenty-ten?) I am still in Alabama. Zach stayed through Christmas and flew back to California a few days later.

We had such a good time while he was in Omaha. One day we hung out downtown, perusing antique shops and a used book store, ending up at this funky, eclectic coffee house that served a great cuppa joe along with jazz music. At one point, while we were in an antique shop, Zach smiled, turned to me and said, "This is so us, mom." Yep, he was right.

We also went see a performance of A Christmas Carol with Todd and his boys. It was quite the production and very impressive. I've always loved the message of forgiveness and redemption in A Christmas Carol and it's even more meaningful to me at this time in my life.

After a week in Omaha, Zach and I drove to Alabama. We took two days and had so much fun talking, cracking ourselves up singing Christmas songs and taking in the sights. We got into town, put my mom's Christmas tree up, got things ready for her to come home. On Christmas Eve we picked her up from the nursing/rehab center and Zach literally carried her over the threshold and into her house. (She's a little tiny thing...)

We had a quiet Christmas and while it was not what we had planned (the original plan was to be in California with Ashleigh and her family, to spend time with John before he leaves, see my Cali family and friends, ect...) but it was where we found ourselves. If there is one thing my kids and I have learned this past year, it's that you cannot hold on to your expectations, plans...whatever...too tightly or you'll go crazy and it's just not worth it. It's better to just roll with what the Lord has for you and come to a place of acceptance. And I know first hand that getting to that place is sometimes filled with a lot of frustration and heartache. : /

Honestly, after the horrible Christmas we had last year, I so desperately wanted to be with my children and grandchildren this start making new memories. Christmas used to be such a joyous and happy time for our family, filled with lots of traditions and fun things. The time leading up the holidays was very, very hard this year. I know for me, it seemed that every single thing I saw, heard, smelled...made me want to cry. It physically hurt...deep down. Memories of Christmases past, that once brought a smile, are blurred and tainted. I had to keep fighting through it, forcing myself to not dwell on what used to be.

Sometimes it's just hard, ya' know?

But we made it through...choosing to focus on the REASON we celebrate Christmas and the reality that it's because of that Babe in the manger that we have made it through this mess so far...and will continue making it. We really have so much to be thankful many blessings in the midst of the heartache.

And speaking of of those is the fact my mom's hip is healing quickly and with no complications. She has no pain and the doctor released her yesterday to start putting weight on her left leg (she broke her left hip) as tolerated. Todd flew in to spend New Year's with mom and I and while he was here, we went out and got her this little tray that fits on her walker. She was able to do everything on her own, but carry a plate or a cup of coffee. The tray helps so much and makes her more independent. (Sometimes too independent. Those of you who know my mom are smiling with me!)

So the 'plan' at this point is for me leave this weekend if I can get everything in order for my mom before then. I really need to get home because I have important things to do like, uh, get a job. I've about exhausted all my financial resources and the well is run dry! LOL (If I don't laugh, I'll cry!) I've been looking online and there are a few prospects, which is good.

I'll keep y'all posted.

Happy New Year!